It's 16:30 (4:30 for those of you who don't read 24 hour clockese) and it's Friday. Normally, I would heave a big sigh of relief and think TGIF. However, weekends have become somewhat more crazy than my weekdays. Actually, they are about the same, so I guess that means that TGIF has got up and went. While it is wenting somewhere else, I will say instead, "So Far, So Good."
I won't lie, I have been feeling stressed and under the gun lately, and I am less than sure when that is going to change. The good news is that I said 'when' and not 'if'. Change is, as they say, inevitable. However, the form that that particular change will take is an unknown. I have come to believe that the unknown is not only good, but entirely necessary. Not only would knowing the future ruin the surprise, it would probably keep us as unhappy and miserable as it is possible to be. I know what anticipatory anxiety is, and I can tell you that it is almost always wrong. There have been very few times when things have been as bad or worse than I have feared them to be, and this has taught me to not only have a little faith, but to also believe that something good is around the corner waiting for me. I can't imagine what life would be like if I knew that someone was going to mug me, or how blase those wonderful moments in life would become if I was never taken by surprise.
Now let me be clear, I'm not talking about the "I-know-what-is-going-to-happen-so-I-can-change-it" type of future, I'm talking about the "I-know-what-is-going-to-happen-and-there-is-nothing-that-I-can-do-about-it" type future. It's kind of like watching a movie and you can clearly see that the defenseless young protagonist is going to walk into a dark alley infested with thugs and have a very nasty experience, and all of your yelling and waving at the screen is not going to change a thing.
What am I trying to say... it comes down to this: Life has a way of balancing and juggling events and experiences that would put the best circus performer to shame. Knowing what is to come takes the joy and pleasure out of experience, and if we are not here to experience, then what's the point. Yes, I am one of those... I believe in purpose and reasons for existence, and I believe that no matter what happens, we benefit from all of our experiences, especially the ones we don't see coming. I won't say that I will always be happy, and that there won't be a certain amount of sorrow and hardship in life, but as I said before existence is one big balancing act and life has a way...